Pictures 2016

God Encounter 2016

Pictures

Sitting quietly at a table drawing, and pondering all of its ups and downs, went to faint whisper catches my attention but not my eyes. The word please for me like a swift breeze. My heart became still and my spirit rejoiced. Closing my eyes I listened again to whispered Word was soft but clear "Casie". This time it caught , both my eyes and my attention. I looked up and before me sat Jesus. He had lowered his head enough to meet my eyes. His face glowed with white light so it was hard to make out the features but his eyes where hard to forget. He reached out and touched my hand and I laid down my pen. I sat up and looked at him, why is he here? I wondered. He smiled at my thought, I knew he had heard it but he was not caught off guard and he was not hurt by it at all. "I see your pain, in the silence and the smile, I see it." I looked away and down at the floor. "Too much" I whispered sternly. "No, it's truth."he said in a whisper. I refuse to look at him, so he stood and put his hand out, I was reluctant to take it I just wanted to stay where I was. I finally looked up and sighed hard, then I took his hand and stood with him.he smiled really big as I walked away with him. We walk through the store to the front door "where we going?" I asked. He stopped with one hand on the door "walk with me". We walked through the door way but instead of going outside we were in a long hallway. I saw pictures of all my friends and picture frames of mind the hall. I walked over to one of the picture and ran my finger tip over the faces. Some of the pictures had my kids in them. The hall was long and I could not see the other end. "What is this about" I asked in a low voice. Jesus put his hand on my shoulder and said "family", I looked at him and said "these are my friends, and I do see my kids In many of them. I see so many of them as family." Sadness kicked in and I pulled my fingertip a picture and said in a whisper "but who's to say they see me that way." Jesus knelt down and pulled me close he looked into my eyes and said  "they are the family you Long for, they love you, just because it doesn't look how you think it should doesn't mean it's not true. Child, I am giving you freedom, freedom from your past, your pain, and even memories. So go take that freedom and make new memories, new traditions!  Go take new pictures. Don't try to talk yourself out of it! look at who is gathered around and enjoy them." I thought for a moment before I could speak Jesus put he's finger to my lips "there are no (what if's), I made it this way." Tears begin to roll down my face "so I'm OK? You are mad how I messed up everything?" He replied quickly "never. What you were living in was not what I wanted for you. Now that you're free from all the abuse, spread your wings out in the sun, rest, and enjoy this moment. Take a deep breath and let the pain go." He kissed my forehead and stood up. He took my hand and we begin to walk the long hall pointing and talking about the pictures and creating (our) own new memories. 

I'm not angry 05-2014

I'm not angry 05-2014

A little girl in a white dress stands in front of an old house. She was around 7 years old and had shoulder length brown hair. Holding the 3 daisies in her hand she fidgeted with the petals. The little girl took a few steps closer to the house, then slowly made her way to the steps. The voices became louder but where muffled. She could see movement inside, but couldn't make out what was going on inside. The little girl made her way up the steps slowly. Noticing a window She walks over to it. Just looking at the window itself she noticed how dirty and warped it was. The little girl tries to see past it, but still can't make out what's going on. So she tries to wipe the window with her hand and pressed against the glass to try and see what was inside, the images where still hard to make out. She watched and covered her mouth with a gasp. The image she sees inside seems very angry in its movements. As she watches she becomes afraid of the image. The little girl heard a sound and turned to see a man walk up to the door of the house. The girl quickly grabs the mans arm and says "don't go in there!" The man stoops down and asks "Why are you standing outside?" the little girl looked at the man then back at the image through the window. She said "Have you seen whats in there?" The man smile and said "Yes, I come here often" The little girl peered through the window and said "You meet with him? He seems so angry." The man looked at her confused. He stood up and walked over to the window. He looked through the dirty distorted window and the image he saw was contorted and its movements seemed angry. He chuckled and said "I see the problem." The man took a rag out of his pocket and cleaned all the mud off the window. He smiled, "that's a little better!" The little girl looked through the window, she saw a man moving about the house, The image was still scary because the window was warped. The man looked at her and said "the best way for you to know he is not angry is to meet with him." the little girl was scared, the man through the warped window still seemed so angry. The man took her hand and said "Follow me, there is nothing to fear." She was reluctant but she took his hand and went with the man. When they walked through the door she saw a older man sitting in a chair. He smiled at her and said "welcome child" she looked around the room in a bit of a panic. The old man asked "What's the matter child?" She said I have watched through the window and I saw an angry person in here. The old man chuckled and said "No one is angry here." She looked up at the man who walked her inside and said "Is he who you come to see?" The man smiled and said "He is my father...and he is your father." The little girl looked confused. The older man said "Child, you have stood outside that window for so long. Everything you know about me has been twisted and isn't true. Come, come child sit with me." She let go of the mans hand and slowly walked to the older man. She stood before him and he said "You are so beautiful my precious child. My love for you is bigger then you can understand." The little girl said "Your not angry?" He chuckled and said "I never was" he picked her up and she sat on his lap. She leaned back against his chest and could feel his heart beat. All her fears slowly began to melt away. Her father held her close. She realized this was so much better then being on the outside looking in.